


Good Bones and Bad Choices

by silasfinch



Category: Neighbours (TV)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-18 08:26:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18117041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silasfinch/pseuds/silasfinch
Summary: Episode Headcanon aftermath : Mark finds out and Chloe isn't dealing well"You are consoling the wrong Brennan - the cheap, second rate one with a terminal diagnosis. Go and find your husband. You made your opinion on the matter clear!""Stop talking about yourself like that you know; I hate it!." Elly whispers hoarsely."It's true though isn't it? Everybody thinks so - Mark went into great detail in the driveway.""He is angry, and hurt can you blame him?"





	Good Bones and Bad Choices

**Author's Note:**

  * For [0mniessence](https://archiveofourown.org/users/0mniessence/gifts).



> Still dyslexic - please be gentle with comments. 
> 
> I couldn't get a song out of my head - works for the whole triangle. 
> 
>  
> 
> When the bones are good, the rest don't matter  
> Yeah, the paint could peel, the glass could shatter  
> Let it rain 'cause you and I remain the same  
> When there ain't a crack in the foundation  
> Baby, I know any storm we're facing  
> Will blow right over while we stay put  
> The house don't fall when the bones are good

  
_When the bones are good, the rest don't matter_  
_Yeah, the paint could peel, the glass could shatter_  
_Let it rain 'cause you and I remain the same_  
_When there ain't a crack in the foundation_  
_Baby, I know any storm we're facing_  
_Will blow right over while we stay put_  
_The house don't fall when the bones are good_

_Call it dumb luck, but baby, you and I_  
_Can't even mess it up, although we both try_  
_No, it don't always go the way we planned it_  
_But the wolves came and went and we're still standing_

_The Bones - Maren Morris_

  
The outcome was entirely predictable, but Elly's rejection is still devastating.

The devastating that brings out all your insecurities in a big complicated mess - right from childhood to present day.

Mark's words ring haunting true and are made all the worse because we had the pleasure of an audience in all their finery. My sins are on display for all the world to see. I am the Brennon who drifts through life, throwing a wrecking ball into others happy lives - a financial and physical burden - even though my siblings are far from perfect. The role of black sheep was mine long before I fell in love with Elly Conway.

"I think its best if you lay low for a while."

I somehow resist the urge to snap at Aaron for stating the obvious. He could be firmly on Team Mark, so any communication is a bonus. The problem is that this town is far too small and I don't have enough money to make a grand exit to Paris or somewhere else. The drama with Leo and my resume is going to haunt my career prospects for the next few months.

  
***

I want to drink myself into oblivion, but the thought of Aaron bailing me out is too humiliating to contemplate. Besides Mark and Elly are both so respected its likely I will choose the one watering hole with their friends in it. The same goes for the lesbian population of online hookup sites. I have just enough pride not to weep on the shoulder of the first brunette I can find on there.

Instead, I walk for miles and try to gather my thoughts into some order. Fortunately, travelling requires a good collection of walking shoes, so my sneakers are working well - the Australian weather still takes some getting used to again.

I wonder if there is a place for self-destructive home wreckers of International Woman's Day? Nobody would be making a video about me years to come. I wonder if I would get to Sonya's stage and start a fundraising drive while genuinely sick complete with muscle spasms and balance disasters? My feet take me to a familiar place in the end without conscious thought.

Fortunately, I don't end up sitting in front of Ely's house like a pathetic puppy with loyalty issues.

The Australian healthcare system is surprisingly good to me.

There are multiple services available to me now that there is a formal diagnosis. The one that matters to me most at 11 pm is Terry Lu - a support group leader who immediately pegged me as a lost soul. I skip more meetings that I attend, but he is always willing to meet for coffee whatever the hour. His major selling point at the moment is that he has no connections to the neighbourhood, except maybe working with David a time or two.

"So you know that advice you gave me about reaching out to my family and strengthing bonds - imagine pretty much the exact opposite. The Chaos of Chole strikes again!" is my feeble attempt at humour when he opens the door.

Terry is a tiny man who succeeds in making me feel tall - originally from Vietnam his family tree is littered with Huntington's, and he wants to increase family support and awareness. He doesn't bat an eyelid when I collapse against him weeping as if the world has ended.

It takes a glass of water and twenty minutes for me to be able to relay the story in all its gory detail.

"That must be hard for you both" is his only response.

"That's it?"

"It seems to me you are doing enough condemning for the both of us. Come on I'll make you dinner. We can discuss our trip back home."

He is offering me an escape - our 'plan' was a conversation over lunch at one of the few groups I attended. I take the lifeline and start rambling about temples, food and old digs.

***

  
There is a constant clock in my head.

It is part of the reason why I push so hard with Elly in spite of all the heartbreak warning signs. I feel in my bones that we could build something beautiful and real; it wasn't a lie that the thought of one person is terrifying to me. Contrary to popular opinion my goal in life isn't to destroy Mark's happiness; he isn't the one for Elly. I would think this even if I wasn't madly in love with her.

I am a selfish person just like they all claim but how many chances am I going to get to find a soulmate in the next 15 years so? We should have at least a few good years.

I want to travel with somebody who knows me inside out, rather than just a temporary travel companion. There is a luxury in the squabbling over destinations and dental floss. Mel isn't entirely wrong - loneliness is biting.

I want to set down roots somewhere - contribute to bills and household chores. It might be nice to own a dog or cat that I can flood social media with like Aaron and David are with their dog child.

I need to make difficult decisions in the future with scary options. The thought of facing medical questions alone is heartbreaking. Maybe Elly is right and loving someone includes the worse moments and expiration date.

I will need my family in one form or another - I don't have the luxury of running away for the rest of my life.

  
***

My timing is spectacularly bad as always.

I am just starting to feel less like the worst human being in the state. Terry insists on feeding me and talking through the worst of my fears and self-pity. The confessions of Chloe Brennen do not make pretty listening, but the man is a saint. He provides a perspective that few people in my life can. I leave his house with a takeout bag and a list of supplements to help with my anxiety and sleep.

Of course, I have to pick the one chemist that Elly is coming out of followed by her protective mother. The three of us freeze in a comical moment before the older woman advances on me - ignoring the fact that we are in a very public car park.

"You have some nerve hanging around town- after all the damage you have wrought on my daughter and your brother..." this is the start of a lecture.

"Mum!" Elly hisses frantically "leave her alone!"

"My daughter doesn't deserve a lonely broken future like..." she has the grace to stop before completing the sentence.

"like me?" I finish for her "so everybody keeps telling me. I'll go now."

Elly looks close to either crying or throwing up and offers no resistance as I push past her. The only mercy in the situation is that she isn't in the beautiful wedding dress that will haunt my dreams.

  
"Chloe wait!"

I have precisely zero intention of following Elly's instructions; in fact, avoiding Mr and Mrs Mark Brennon is my primary life goal for the foreseeable future. The cheep AirB&B on the outskirts of town is my bolthole for the next few weeks. I have just about enough money for a one-way ticket back to Europe.

Unfortunately, Elly is a lifelong runner, so she catches me easily and pulls me around her eyes full of fear and sadness. She is breathing heavily as if she has sprinted straight from the chemist. It takes me a second to realise the image that I presented to her and her mother, A troubled woman on the verge of tears carrying a bag full of pills, wine and grooming products. The misunderstanding would be amusing if it weren't such a messy situation already.

A small selfish part of me that I don't like very much feels a surge of validation.

"I'm not going to do anything extreme, Elly" I wave the offending bags "my support group buddy gave some herbal recommendations for anxiety and sleep."

Elly sags with relief - she seems worryingly close to an asthma attack.

"I'm not going to be the pathetic drama queen this time - cheesy movies and wine for me."

***

"You are consoling the role Brenon - the cheap, second rate one with a terminal diagnosis. Go and find your husband. You made your opinion on the matter clear!"

"Stop talking about yourself like that you know; I hate it!." Elly whispers hoarsely.

"It's true though isn't it? Everybody thinks so - Mark went into great detail in the driveway."

"He is angry, and hurt can you blame him?"

"I go back to my original suggestion - go and find your husband. Saint Mark will forgive you in a heartbeat. I can be a funny anecdote in the decades to come" my words are angry and bitter, but that's an improvement on heartbroken.

The only reason I let Elly in after she realised I wasn't planning on doing anything drastic is the desire to avoid a big scene in my friend's neighbourhood. One of the reasons Elly has my heart is her stubbornness and drive. There is no way she leaves the conversation there. Selfishly, she wants the best of both worlds, me as her best friend and Mark as a husband. Unfortunately, the real world doesn't one of us is going to lose.

"It's not that simple - I can't bear causing you any more pain."

"I'll heal - Mark needs you more."

My therapist would be proud of me for the noble sacrifice but it feels hollow, and she doesn't move. It seems I can't even do that right.

***

"Will you give me some time?"

"Kind of running on a time deficit to match my credit cards" my Huntington's jokes are getting old I need to work on some new material.

"Chloe..."

Elly still sounds like the disappointed teacher and friend even in oversized clothes with the remains of expensive makeup still visible through tears. She is my friend first and seeing her pain is almost as part as dealing with my jumble of emotions. There is nothing that I can say to make this better. Knowing my lack of filters and disastrous spontaneity I'll beg her to elope to Vegas where I could take her name.

"I can't shake the feeling that when you leave to catch the next gipsy wind to Bulgaria or whatever I'll never see you again- the best I can hope for a postcard or a health update."

"Ask any one of my siblings, the town or your mother if that will be a bad thing. The poll wouldn't be in my favour. A neurologist might be a good middleman."

We seem to be having opposite physical reactions to our current predicament. Elly is angrily pacing the length of the living room. Her long runner's legs confined by the small space. I am sitting hunched on the coach trying to take up as little space as possible. Elly stops suddenly and looks as if I struck her with a cricket bat. She whirls to face me and sinks to her knees with more grace than I will ever possess.

"I'm so sorry I made you feel like the bad guy - it wasn't fair on so many levels. Please don't abandon your ties with your brothers on account of me - you need them Chloe, and they need you."

"I'm a loner - always have been - don't worry I'll find a Brazilian babe to mend my foolish broken heart. I will ask for her rainbow ID upfront first though."

Elly reaches to hold my hand in spite of everything the touch still soothes me.

"I have feelings for you - it wasn't just a one-way thing."

The words would be more touching if she didn't look like she wants to throw up and run back to Mark any second.

"I know - believe it or not, a straight girl faking or experimenting for comfort is pretty easy to spot - you aren't a natural actress Elly."

"My heart is torn in two - please give me time to think. Please don't run away or at least give me a return date."

"Okay"

 

 

 


End file.
